a new blog and some random thoughts :]

So I decided to start a new blog. I'm not sure why I started a new one, but I think I've had my xanga for too long. It's changed so much over the years that I don't even know how to use about 75% of the functions on there anymore. I was actually thinking about deleting my xanga and stop blogging all together. Especially because I'm not very consistent with blogging. Oh well, I'll probably be writing when I can, without the internet language I usually use (not that it's bad to use it, but I figure that I should keep my writing skills sharpened somehow). :]

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[Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you, as though something strange were happening to you. but rejoice insofar as you share Christ sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you.] 

1 Peter 4:12-14

These verses bring me joy. :] Just the fact that I can even begin to comprehend what Christ went through the cross for my sins to reconcile be with my Father insofar that I suffer not for my own sake, but for the name of Christ, makes my suffering seem so minimal. I know I can't fully comprehend the extensive excruciating suffering that my Savior experience, but just to be able to understand just even one bit makes me want to know Jesus more. I feel so encouraged to able to identify myself with Christ. Dang, it's so crazy to even think that Christ is the great High Priest who understands OUR weaknesses, that is seriously so amazing.  All of this sudden, suffering doesn't really matter that much to me more, as long as I am learning to love Christ more. 

It's kind of strange though, not that it's totally out of the ordinary. Part of me is telling me that I don't want to go through any hardship, while the other part is telling me that it's alright because God gave me trials in order that I may be sanctified. However, it's so convicting to think that the only way to Christ is by giving up my own desires and wants. It's so convicting that the only way that the gospel can be known and spread is by sacrificing myself. It's so hard to give myself up because of my pride, and it will be something that I have to struggle with the rest of my life. Man, I'm so weak, but Christ shall remain my anchor. May the gospel continually spur me on to be earnest and diligent in my faith. :] 

It's so encouraging to know that I'm not totally on my own though aside from Christ (not that Christ is insufficient, but it's nice to have friends around :]). It's so encouraging to know that I have awesome brothers and sisters that God has placed in my life that are with me every step of the way, praying for me. Ahh, I love them so much. I seriously can't believe that they would be caring for such a person like me sometimes. They're seriously awesome. God is seriously a genius and so loving to have given us the Church. The Lord is seriously so gracious and awesome. :D

Praise God for salvation!! Praise God for the church!!! May God's name be known, and the Lord be glorified in everything!!

I hope that was somewhat coherent, haha, but I guess that's what's been on my heart lately. :] 

Hope everybody is having a good day. :D

_saMMmm